Three empty water bottles are sitting in my kitchen sink. They have been sitting there for at least four days. I don’t know how long they will sit there, but they might make it through to the heat death of the universe. I took the empty water bottles out of the refrigerator the other day because they were, as you may have gathered, empty.
I can’t say who keeps putting empty water bottles back into the fridge because I haven’t caught them in the act yet. But I will; believe me, I will.
In the meantime, I have resolved never to fill these water bottles again. Not until somebody else does.
Jane asked me the other day whether the water bottles in the sink were part of my ongoing war against the children, a war I declared when the issue of the empty water bottles in the refrigerator became intolerable. Intolerable, I tell you.
I confirmed, yes, that was the case.
She nodded and moved on.
Did I mention that the water bottles remain in the sink?
I noticed this afternoon that Thomas was filling water bottles, at this very sink! But they were not the correct water bottles. He has placed within his possession several other water bottles.
I almost said to him, “Why are you filling those water bottles when the other water bottles are in the sink, waiting to be filled?”
But that was not part of my plan and I believe in the plan.
And so I wait, until the heat death of the universe if necessary. I wait for the water bottles in the sink to be filled and returned to the fridge.
Yes sir, Capt. Queeg.
We have the ice and water thing in the fridge door. Now its just the puddle that is constantly in front of the fridge that needs to be dealt with. Given no one did it, no one used it and there's no water glasses left in the cupboard at 9AM. All 36 have disappeared. What's wrong with drinking it from the tap I ask you?
Have... have your children become the next set of terrible housemates? Are you marooned in the unwritten modern day sequel to Felafel, now known as living with teenagers? Is parenthood just the next stage of terrible share house arrangements? 😱
I'm so glad that I chose eternal servitude to feline overlords rather than choosing to live with another human being. All the water bottles in my fridge remain filled, because I'm the only one here to empty and then refill them. The system works.
This is parenting done right.
I served at the battle of Towel, people throw around labels like ‘Pyrrhic’ & ‘Petty’ but they weren’t there, they don’t know.
Instead of the sink, place the bottles in a box labeled "Goodwill" (or opportunity or charity shop). See what happens next.
I keep checking back to read the comments to see if this battle has progressed in any way... The tension is palpable.
It appears to me that you are losing the war and that the enemy is at least one step ahead of you at every turn.
I’ve been watching this thing on Stan with Simon Pegg where the Ruskies reverse engineered a cyber attack and knew everything the Brits would do in response.
this needed to come with a trigger warning. I am fighting similar battles on a number of fronts and losing every one of them. Maybe i should outsource but i worry i'll be pulled up in front of the hague, "no your honour i did not pay for that man to burn everything in my kids room because they wouldnt clean". Don't get me started on light switches. I swear those things are back on just as i turn my back.
There are only two of us in the house. I counted 8 various waterbottles which are filled and kept in the fridge - there has to be 8 becuase this is the only way I can be sure there will be one full water bottle to drink.
We have a refillable pitcher with a filter. I have filled it every day for yrs. Apparently I am the only one who can comprehend the intricate nature of turning on the sink to fill it. I wish you luck but my guess is that you while you may win an occasional battle ultimately you will lose the war.