Keyboard Shortcuts of the Gods

from The Seven Stages of Drinking Martinis


Even though you’re God, creator and destroyer of worlds, the right keyboard shortcuts can save you a huge amount of time. And sure, you invented time, but wouldn’t it be nice to spend at least some it hanging out in the heavenly hot tub with a perfect margarita instead of at your desk, creating and destroying as though there’s no tomorrow.

Pro tip: You can create a new tomorrow anytime you want by hitting up Cmd+T.

So whether you’re editing reality, rendering an entirely new cosmos from scratch, or simply looking to delete an embarrassing mistake—juggling that reboot of the Nazis and The Gilmour Girls at the same time? Come on. Focus!—these commands will cut down the precious time you spend reaching for the mouse and sifting through menus. Over centuries, millennia and eons, those saved moments really add up.

The basics.

Cmd+Z: Undo Zombiepocalypse.

Perhaps the most useful keyboard shortcut ever invented, Cmd+Z is like Ctrl+Z on Satan’s Windows machine, except where the Dark One’s snappy two fingered keyclick brings forth the rotting hordes of the Undead to devour your creation, a simple Cmd+Z from you sends them right back to Hell.

Cmd+W: Close all These Worlds

Cmd+W is the universal keyboard shortcut for Supreme Beings who have to deep six every single motherfucking window or file they currently have open. It will work for just about anything, from alternate histories where many-tentacled and razor fanged horrors tore through the thin skin of the universe separating them from your frail and silly but ultimately loveable little human pets, to that time you thought it might be fun to let Donald Trump be President of the Planet of the Apes.

Cmd+W really proves its worth when the audit team from the Higher Powers calls by unannounced and you need to shut down all that crazy shit before anyone realises what you did.

Cmd+F: Search

No matter what you’re doing anywhere in the cosmos, you can start a search by hitting Cmd+F. Forgot where you put that supermassive blackhole and worried that it might eat a whole galaxy while you’re not looking? Need to find Elvis before he chokes on that fried peanut butter sandwich? Cmd+F is your new best friend.

Cmd+H: Hide creations

Want to cut down on the clutter, but without deleting whole timelines and the existence of the teeming multitudes within them? Simple but effective, Cmd+H hides all the open windows onto the realities you’re currently using but doesn’t get rid of them. It’s the Go-To key combo when you make the Spice Girls keep putting out album after album but you don’t want the other Gods knowing about your embarrassing obsession.


Gives you more space, for filling up with Spice Girls albums.

Cmd+Opt+Delete: Immediately delete a creation

Normally when you delete your creation, it goes into the cosmic trashcan for a time before the Langoliers eat it and make it completely inaccessible. This can be a great safety net for inexperienced or ambivalent Gods, who might decide they want to, say, restore the Roman Empire or give disco another chance.

But if you can get your world back, so can any snoop with access to your computer. To completely and utterly delete your mistakes, hit Cmd+Opt+Delete and nobody will ever find out about that time that ‘Spice World’ wasn’t just a movie.

Opt+T: Earl Grey, hot.

Instantly creates a steaming pot of tea for you to drink while you ponder the mysteries of your creations.