23 Comments
User's avatar
Jason's avatar

Speaking for the whole of Melbourne - who wears white - weirdo.

Expand full comment
Julia Beckett's avatar

I have started wearing an apron when cooking and washing up, which has helped somewhat but the oily destruction continues.

Expand full comment
ivalley's avatar

This is why I buy multi-packs of fruit-of-the-loom earth-tone t-shirts. With a chest pocket, of course. I, too, have dwelt upon the white t-shirt shame train. No longer.

Expand full comment
Dirk's avatar

remember one thing on white shirts: quantity has a quality of its own. And if you can, get American ones. They tend to fit better ...

Expand full comment
ivalley's avatar

Fruit-of-the-loom multi-packs, Dirk. Tagless. I swear by these.

Expand full comment
Dirk's avatar

*nods* and those from Hanes are a good second. The ones I bought last time I visited you still bring sterling service.

Expand full comment
w from brisbane's avatar

Of course, the original white t-shirt was designed to be worn as underwear.

Last week, I went to a jolly curry restaurant knees-up. I wore a predominantly black collared t-shirt with thinner white lateral stripes. I thought, surely, this one time, when I inevitably spill some curry it will be mainly on the black. Nope, my one spill was perfectly centred on a white stripe. Of course it was.

Expand full comment
Elana Mitchell's avatar

I'm sure there's some law of physics that controls this

Expand full comment
Elana Mitchell's avatar

The benefit of being so pale I glow in the dark is that I can't wear white without a full face of makeup in order for me not to look completely washed out or jaundiced, so I have mastered not destroying white shirts by simply not wearing them.

You need a magic spray to put on the stain and let it soak in before you wash your shirt. My BFF once poured cooking oil all over her brand new maxi dress one Christmas Eve and was convinced it was a write off, and I managed to rescue it with my magic spray. But the trick is to spray it as soon after the staining has occurred as possible, and let it soak for several hours if not days before washing.

Expand full comment
Elana Mitchell's avatar

I meant to add that in choosing to wear white you must accept the inevitability of it staining, so you'll need to up your stain removal game accordingly

Expand full comment
ivalley's avatar

What is your magic spray. We use dish soap, liberally smeared on the stain, followed by a good soak. Works pretty well.

Expand full comment
Elana Mitchell's avatar

Ah I use a fancy spray from an Australian cleaning product company:

https://domhome.com/laundry-/55-liquid-pre-wash-spray.html

Expand full comment
ivalley's avatar

Cheater.

Expand full comment
Elana Mitchell's avatar

Is it cheating to work smarter, not harder? 😇

Expand full comment
Dave W's avatar

I keep misreading this as Fifty Shades of Satin. Send help.

Expand full comment
Elana Mitchell's avatar

Oh that's a whole OTHER genre. We don't talk about that 😲

Expand full comment
Joe Dowling's avatar

Staining shirts no matter the color is my super power. I've now designated all of my Tees as work adjacent. I'd say I've waved the white flag in surrender but alas it too is no longer truly white.

Expand full comment
Michael Barnes's avatar

In the photo the Tshirt looks blue to me not white.

OMG I just flashed back to that online debate about whether the dress was blue and black, or white and gold. shudder.

Expand full comment
Elana Mitchell's avatar

I also thought it was blue!

I thought the dress was white/gold

Expand full comment
Dave W's avatar

Pretty sure this is how Big Cotton get us. They convince us that the plain white shirt is best, knowing all the while that it'll last 3 wears before wine/oil/grass/spaghetti is tipped onto it. Then we have to buy a new one.

Expand full comment
insomniac's avatar

I saw a "hack" the other day that used hand sanitiser on the stain before washing, taking maybe three or four goes to get there, and who doesn't still have a shitload of that stuff hanging around.

Expand full comment
AB's avatar

My perfect white T happens to be black

Expand full comment